Single

I got in trouble a few years ago on a singles FB group for saying that being single doesn't mean broken or incomplete and one could be happy and single, alone.  Holy fire rained down on me, and I was eventually expelled from the group for holding that position... even if it is not only true but much healthier than being with someone only because you are not respecting or loving yourself and need someone else to give it to you.  Trust me from experience that path will lead to disaster and back to where you began.

In both of my marriages, there was a similar problem.  I was giving an insane amount of effort and romance to someone who felt their only necessary participation was to receive it.  My beginning of asking for them to contribute was the end of the relationship, and it should have been a conversation much earlier, before I got so invested.

The flip side makes a very strong case.  When I was single before marriage, between marriages, and after, I focused on my own success and was happy and thriving.  When I was in a relationship, I literally was drained of my success built up prior and criticized and attacked by the very ones who took it all from me.

I'm not saying there cannot be a good relationship, and I hope others find it.  But, my lifelong experience tells me that the odds of a happy and prosperous life are much higher on my own, and even though I keep my eye open to a good match I'm less willing to surrender that foundation, unless I see something different than a half century to this point.

So.. I repeat.  Single doesn't mean broken or incomplete.  It doesn't mean you are failing the world by being a "single cat lady" either.  It may mean you have found your happiness without needing it to come from another, and that is quite an achievement in this world, today.