Successfully Single

First of two blogs I have planned for tonight.  I waited to watch a few Lady Jane Grey episodes.  If you haven't seen it on Amazon Prime, I highly recommend it.  So good.

Anyway.. to begin.  Earlier today in a social media share, I used the phrase "successfully single" ... it was saying what would be wrong with someone to be attractive, intelligent, successful and yet single.  I shared saying why must we assume there's something wrong with being successfully single.  It's true on both interpretations of that... successful and single and being successful at being single.  But, I do think it warrants explaining what SINGLE.... is.

Single doesn't mean abstinence ... it's not being a monk with no sexual or romantic interests or activities.  It simply means not in a relationship.  Until you get in a relationship, you are...in fact.. single, even as you explore with vigor and the ability to chart your own future.  

Florida for the last few years taught me a lot... a lot that I think many Midwestern people have no basis for understanding.  When you are raised with the expectation that the culmination of life is getting married and having kids, you can feel your life is over when that happens pr when that leaves.  But, I experienced for years, there, a different reality... where people would go out, drink and talk with strangers, have a fun night and start all over another night. Or... going on a date and having interesting conversation with someone you knew you'd never see again.  But... it was a fun night.

Especially when you are older and the prospect of having new children is no longer a factor, everything changes.  And, most if not all that are older and single have had enough with the pain of relationship failures and just want... a good evening to forget everything and have fun.

Also, there was a book I've referenced in the past called Choosing to Cheat... written by a minister of all things, I believe.  It said that you can either be successful at a career or a relationship but not both.. so you choose to cheat yourself at both to balance.  But.. what if you didn't have to choose?

More and more,  I think Charlie on Two and a Half Men had it right.. especially after my ending result of relationships.  Someone may eventually convince me to settle down... maybe.. but I intend to explore in all meanings what can happen if you choose your own success and happiness, instead... and that will include flirting and fun, along the way.