I've been quiet on the blog and as relates to personal thoughts on social media over the last week. In part that was because I was dealing with several challenges, especially after my car got hit from behind and made it not legal to drive on the road and likely totalled due to the age of the car and mileage versus the damage. When that happened, my ability to earn money also came to a screeching halt, as well, with almost nothing in my account, because I had just paid a phone payment right after replacing a tire in the week after paying monthly rent.
When that happened, I also had to shift into safety and survival mode in Maslow’s pyramid with all my brain power being dedicated to solutions of that. I couldn't even get to the doctor to get checked out. But, after many days of calls and claims, I am covered financially for at least long enough to get something else going.
I did have random thoughts and feelings about the situation, too, and as the safety issues cleared I focused more time on them... bringing that dark cloud into more focused determination. Last night, I watched Wish on Disney Plus, and it actually helped me with this focusing. I'll explain.
In Wish, the king of the land collected everyone's wishes to "protect" them and when he did so, they forgot about them, leaving it in the hands of the king to decide who's wishes were worthy of granting. The movie surrounds a girl that learned all this and asked why the wishes that wouldn't be granted by him couldn't be given back to them to try to make happen on their own, but the king didn't want to lose his power over their dreams. I don't need to give more of the movie... watch it yourself. But, I give that summary to refer to as I explain my own mentality changes, ahead.
The last years have been a series of life challenges to overcome. Indeed, the morning they picked up my car to evaluate, I returned to my extended stay room to find the door lock battery dead. I had to call the after hours number to have them fix it to get back inside. Now, is this years of being cursed or being judged or what? I don't know. I've made it clear that I don't trust a divine power to just... grant my wish.. as in the movie, nor a spell to just make it happen. It's also become very clear that love is not just going to happen and aid for my needs will fall from the sky. My whole life has been me providing solutions to my problems, generally. Some might help with temporary aid, but lasting solutions came from my own sweat and thinking.
So, like the movie, I'm tired of waiting for it to all just happen. I'm also tired of not having a backup budget for when life... or spiritual entities... throw a tantrum in my direction. So, I'm dedicating my time and energy to setting up a firm financial foundation and rebuild my life... myself.
Benjamin Franklin said that God helps those that help themselves, which is really saying they will help themselves and God will get the credit. Regardless, it's about time my wishes took a walk and I provided for myself... and it will happen.
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